The Battle of the One Shoulder Dress

Spring is here! As we look around and find new trends for spring fashion, in 2011 we see the one shoulder dress make a come back.   It looks pretty, it may even fit nicely when you try it on. Doesn't she look hot in this dress guys or what? 

So what does this dress have to do with your life? You might NOT care about this dress or being fashionable. You may like to wear green or orange crocks and an old t-shirt with jeans. Who cares about this dress? What's the point anyway?
Who cares about what anyone wears? It's what on the inside that matters - right?

Sometimes people can be as asymmetrical as this dress. Outside they are nice, fun, honest but inside something is missing, maybe it's the other shoulder of their internal foundation, their so called dress. Two faces of the same outfit.

When the rest of the world is watching, some people act one way. In private, with their family they are a completely different person, putting their whole family to shame.

Taking the analogy a step further, we find that we have to watch out for the symbolic mask that people, countries and even whole societies wear. We are subconsciously forced to use our imagination to fill in the gap, following our internal gap analysis strategy to calm our complicated mind. There is something intriguing and powerful about filling in the gap and trying to imagine what the other strap of the dress might look like - a sneak peak at what's inside.

In this week's Torah portion we are taught the rules of keeping kosher. We are reminded that a pig may look like any other meat, but it's not healthy for you because it consumes garbage - on the inside, it's just filthy garbage. But this is not just about the food! Just because something or someone looks like a million dollars on the outside - a true super star, a real beauty, a winner - means absolutely nothing until that person can be good, kind, ethical and honest on the inside, a person that has strong principles and beliefs!

It's easy to deceive society into believing you are good and easily gain trust of those that are vulnerable, naive, trusting. What is much harder is to live every day of your life with an impeccable set of values and strive to be better each day. We see this on every level, from children in school to dictators of countries who condition their people to believe in them out of hope, fear, trust.

But the two faced people and two faced societies will one day lose the battle of the blue one shoulder dress. Sooner or later the asymmetrical strap will fall off and will be exposed for what it is, even if the person that wears this symbolic dress is seen as a superstar, their fame is short lived!

As humans we are programmed genetically to believe in symmetry (or harmony) because it's not only pleasing to the eye, psychologically it gives us a sense of stability. It is easier for our brain to understand and create an environment that is responsive to something we are biologically prone to achieve. This does not mean we need to stop being creative, it just means that we deserve to reach for having the complete power of showing the world the whole dress so that no one can claim a discrepancy between your inside and outside self.

Bottom line: BE YOURSELF and be your best both on the inside and outside!


Dedication: This is dedicated to people who seek truth and are not scared to express their complete opinion, create a debate, take a controversial view and don't compromise who they are - even if it means someone will not approve. We need to pick our battles but also prove that we are real! To my designer friends - I love fashion and no harm was done to any blue one strap dresses :)